Understanding the Not-Understandable....

So it's been awhile since I have posted, perhaps because I have had little to say, or perhaps because I am being lazy. Anyways, so I had an epiphany about a month ago while sitting in church. Interesting that I call it an epiphany, for an epiphany means:

1.	(initial capital letter) a Christian festival, observed on January 6, commemorating the manifestation of Christ to the gentiles in the persons of the Magi; Twelfth-day.

2.	an appearance or manifestation, esp. of a deity.

3.	a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something, usually initiated by some simple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.

4.	a literary work or section of a work presenting, usually symbolically, such a moment of revelation and insight.

I didn't know about the Christian festival, but I guess you learn something all the time. Now for the three of you reading this, I shall continue to explain the irony of my epiphany.

Without getting too much into brain science, we operate on a system of a left and right brain, some that I have explained before. The left brain is the logical, explicit side that regulates our right brain, the experiential, emotional, implicit side of the brain. Trauma occurs when we experience overwhelming emotions, hence our right brain is firing like crazy, and there is no logic to regulate. Hence, a very deep experience is implanted in our brains that has no explanation. There is no category in the human brain that understands being hit, molested, or screamed at. No category for why people would choose to fly airplanes into a building nor take our a gun and begin shooting former peers and friends.

Now, so I was sitting in church, and the pastor gave an illustration that made my epiphany occur. He took a filing cabinet, a box wrapped up like a present, and tried to stick the present, which obviously would not fit, in the filing cabinet. While doing so, he explained that we have no category in our brains for things like trauma, nor do we have a category for God's grace. Wow. It clicked. Right there, somehow God's grace began to make sense, or yet, how it doesn't make sense.

But do we try to make it? I know I certainly do. I think we all want so badly to understand God's grace, and perhaps, at least for me, I try to work for my goodness, for if I am "good", then I think I can understand God's grace, for He has a reason to love me. And in our society, that's what we live on, our merit. You have good credit, you get a good loan. You have a good driving record, you get lower insurance. You perform well at work, you get promoted.

I think this is why skeptics are skeptics. Because God's grace doesn't make logical sense in this science based world we live in. I don't know about the two of you, but for me, that makes my faith stronger. I don't have to prove it to anyone, because God's grace doesn't fit in our culture, nor in my brain.

I find it also interesting that the healing for the trauma that many experience can truly be found in something almost as confounding. And that, my friends, is the irony of the epiphany. The good news is that His grace is greater than any trauma, and can heal all trauma.

The problem of technology

So I realize that I have neglected to post in a while, but I'm just about done with school and have time to post more, so I am going to. Today I was getting back in to Richard Pratt's book Designed for Dignity in my commitment to finish that book as well as a few others that I would like to blog about. Anyways, today I was reading as he shared a story about how he thought that replacing the typewriter in his office would only help, but how it just allowed for more work to be done and did not relieve the stress of his secretary. Wow. I found this to be true, and for me, how he elaborated on how every technological advance has a price to pay. The technology for nuclear energy also allows us to create nuclear bombs. This was true for me when I got a Blackberry. I love hated it. I loved the fact that I could be so connected, yet hated it. I thought I liked getting emails, but realized how much my anxiety and stress increased as some urgency to respond would overcome me. After I view months I regressed to the standard Nokia that does nothing more than make phone calls.

But to me, the bigger problem is our society as a whole. More innovation appears to only create more things to be concerned with, more work to fill our day, more garbage to fill the earth as we buy the newest thing. Like, for instance, an article I saw about the newest iPod and how the iPod classic, of which I am a proud owner of, will become obsolete in the next go round, which now occurs annually. New iPods and new iPhones, better, more memory, as if they don't already have enough. But truthfully, I do think God has blessed us on earth with many great things. We use them daily in many good ways, but I worry that it may be to our own detriment. I would be lying if I said I didn't want to newest iPod or Mac, perhaps the newest car or entertainment system, but the truth is some part in me knows I won't ever be satisified.

So, I choose not to look too deeply into what is the newest, latest, greatest, thing as my way of dealing with it. But I am also definitely guilty of indulging in new innovations and putting aside relationship with others. The comforting thing is that God created us and made a covenant with Noah that would make this world stable enough to go and explore, to create dominion. The world is safe, or at least I find that I know it won't be too choatic because of this covenant. And now the struggle for me becomes how do I use technology in a way that subdues in a positive way and is a blessing for me and to others, rather than in a detrimental manner. So what about you? Has technology been a positive or negative thing in your life?

Humility? Dignity? Perhaps a taste of both

I've not taken a break from my origin task, but I am constantly seeking to integrate what I find in the Bible or in authors who write about the Bible and what I find in psychotherapy technique and theory. So I have finished Keller's A Reason for God and do have a few mental posts relating that to the book on mirror neurons, as well as a few others. But recently I have been reading Richard Pratt's Designed for Dignity, which is a book taking a perspective from the Old Testament on what our purpose on earth was prior to the Fall and after, but I guess it never really has changed. Anyways, one of his points in the book is that we are made in the image of God, hence, we are not Gods nor anything less than images of Him. I see the point Pratt is making as very similar to and perhaps more applicable than Carl Jung's few of the person. Jung, a psychiatrist, friend of Freud, and somewhat philosopher is known for his work on analytic psychology. Jung proposed the idea of the shadow and ego. The shadow is the part of us that takes on all the undesireable traits we see in others, it is the opposite of the ego. The ego is our projection of what we like about ourselves, perhaps our best foot or the parts we like about ourselves. For instance, if I like to think of myself as thoughtful, then my shadow holds my potential to be more feeling oriented and vice versa. The interesting thing to myself is that Jung's theory is that we vacillate between thinking the best of ourselves and then the worst, basically from extreme ego to extreme shadow. I have found for myself that this can be extremely anxiety provoking and depression inducing. One minute "I am the best" and the next "I am terrible." I have seen this a lot in dealing with others as well. Jung proposed that we must learned to be centered between our ego and shadow, or perhaps acheive a balance.

I have found that thinking more of myself in this manner as tremendously helpful, but more so in the terms of Christ and being made in God's image. I have found Pratt's means to working this out in my own mind as most helpful. By Pratt's proposition and God's work, we are not Gods, hence I am not as wonderful as my ego likes to tell me at times. I find being humble as the best means to bring my ego to the center, rather than the use of the shadow that typically leads to a depressed state. On the contrary, I am not as bad as my shadow would like for me to believe at times. Hence, I find Pratt being helpful here in that I can have dignity and respect for myself being made in the image of God. I find having dignity is far more useful and helpful to drawing my shadow to the center rather than trying out my ego. Jung would say we have to break through the barriers in between to get centered. I just think the way God has made us and realizing that is far more effective.

Sadie and Me

So this might be divergent from the proposed topic of discussion, but after some thought, I think it is highly relevant. I sat down with Mary Margaret tonight to watch a seemingly innocent movie, Marley & Me. I began watching in my ignorance only be taken to a deep place of tears by the end. The movie got to me because one, it's just sad. But the movie also grabbed a hold of my experiential memory of my now deceased dog, Sadie. You see, my lab Sadie was an rambunctious spirit much like the lab Marley in the movie. Thinking about those times of her chewing up everything in the yard, tipping her big bucket of fresh drinking water over on herself to cool off, or pining for the opportunity to break free from the backyard to sprint off for an adventure, brought me to a place of weeping with happiness and sadness. One thing that really got to me was that Sadie loved me for me. She didn't care about my grades or if I made the big play in football practice or if I was "cool". She was ignorant of my self-critical thoughts and my insecurities. She new nothing of my narcissism. She was genuinely attracted to me. Now, I know I may have lost you at this point, after all, I am speaking of a dog, but of also something true. The point in the movie that caused me to completely loose it was the point in which the father, John, played by Owen Wilson, speaks of how a dog can make you feel extraordinary and special and how they don't care about all the things that I tend to get so wrapped up in. My question is this and it's the thought that got me, How much more does Christ love me? Does he flail unabashedly with glee and happiness over me and all of his children when I come into his presence? I think so. And I think he's awaiting us to come to him anxiously, much like my dog. Sometimes I'd like to think he looks at all my "good" things and likes me for those. Sometimes I dread to think that he sees my "bad" things. He sees it all. But he still loves me, much like my dog Sadie. Now to think, how can I treat others that way, to mirror Christ's love?

An Explanation.....

So if you are wondering about the title, here is my best explanation. In short, the idea is based on the concept of mirror neurons. Mirror neurons sit packed into our brains and do exactly what the title says, mirror. Mirror neurons pick up on facial expressions from others and tell our brains at a fundamental level whether or not we should feel threatened and the proper action to take in response. I won't go too much into the fine biology here of what is happening, but more so toying with the idea of mirroring Christ to others, and to ourselves. At a basic level, how might we respond to Christ? What message would our brain receive from him if he were looking at us? This is important to me to think of this not only in terms of relating, but also from a philosophical standpoint. Some atheist, such as Sam Harris, are using the concept of mirror neurons to explain the origin of all human emotion. Currently, I am reviewing literature in multiple facets, including Tim Keller's A Reason for God and Marco Iacoboni's Mirroring People and hope to share what I learn as well as my own thoughts with you and welcome your comments.

Purpose

So here goes my first attempt at my own blog. I guess this post is somewhat a "mission statement" of sorts. I chose the title based on what I believe and how I want to be towards others in both my profession and with my wife, friends, and family. I desire to be like Christ, as difficult as it is at times, to all. The purpose of this blog is not necessarily to state how I see ministry and relating, but rather my own "parsing" it out. So I invite you to come along and read with me. I welcome your comments and desire your discussion. I certainly hope not to come off as authoritarian in my view and want to emphasize that I desire discussion, not debate. Anyways, happy reading. I hope that I inspire some deep thought and building up of the body.